More Than A Wedding

Today Cinthia discusses the Wedding at Cana (John2:1-11) during which Jesus performed His first miracle on earth.  The fact that Jesus performed His first miracle at a family event – a wedding, specifically – and at the request of a family member, has significance.  The Bible calls Jesus the Bridegroom and the Church His Bride.  God loves and values family, and we are His family.  However, this account also shows us Jesus as a man (yes, also God, but still a man) and a son and family member.  It gives great insight into gender issues, as well as our approach to God and His to us.  So how did Jesus respond as a man to His female family member?

Jesus, as a male human being with a male brain, gave an initial response that indicated the problem Mary described was not naturally significant to Him in His role as a wedding guest.  Cinthia explored several translations and paraphrases of His response, all of which seemed to indicate that He did not see the problem as one He needed to solve as a human attending someone else’s wedding.  He was not the one throwing the feast, and it was not yet time for His miraculous ministry as the Son of God.  He basically said, “Right now, I’m just a man at a feast.  What does this problem have to do with me?”  

Men often see things very differently than women do, and this is okay.  Women can learn from Mary not to be hurt when a man does not initially see a problem in the same way she does.  Mary went to Jesus, her son, and communicated about a very specific need.  She told Him what the problem was, asking Him for help.  She did not become wounded when He responded honestly.  (Cinthia noted that men often say no first and relent later, while women often do the opposite.)  Then she let Him solve it.  She didn’t make several suggestions about the best way for Him to do this, when He needed to do it, etc.  Mary shows us how to communicate with a good man.  Having told Him specifically about the problem, she left the issue with Him and did not try to control the process; she just trusted that He would care about the fact that she was asking Him for help.

And He did.  Jesus saw that this problem, which may not have seemed relevant to Him as a Man or significant in the bigger picture, was important to Mary.  He responded honestly to her about how He saw the problem, but, because it mattered to her, Jesus made it important to Him.  He not only involved Himself in what mattered to Mary but did about it immeasurably more than she asked Him to do. 

Jesus showed us that God responds to us and cares about what is important to us.  He may not always do things in the timing we initially request, but He does care and will give revelation about timing, significance, etc., when we talk to Him about the problem.  As Mary went directly to Jesus, we need to go to God first, only then asking other people for help.  Start with the vertical and only then proceed to the horizontal.

Jesus also showed us here what it means to be a good man dealing with His family.  Some things seem important to a woman that do not seem important to a man.  Jesus gave Mary His honest perspective, but He did not try to talk her out of her need, nor did He belittle it.  Jesus made the problem His concern because it was important to her, and He did more for her than she asked – giving more wine than was needed and making it of the highest quality -- because He valued her.  This, explains Cinthia, is love.  Cinthia continues, “Men, you are the leader, the protector, the provider, the covering.  Follow the lead of your Savior, and help the women in your life.  Make their lives easier [with] kindness, gentleness, mercy when you’re not understanding why this is so important to the woman that you love.”

This first miracle revealed His glory, and His disciples believed in Him.  They had been walking with Him for some time at this point, but, apparently, they had not yet fully believed in Him.  You are in good company when you have trouble believing that God will do something.  Don’t shame yourself over doubt.  It is hard to believe in something you cannot see.  It is hard to believe in something that others have messed up and misrepresented.

As noted, Jesus’s first miracle during His life on earth was at a wedding, a family event that created a new branch of family, and was at the request of a family member.  Family is very important to God.  When you belong to God, you are His family.  He will not reject you, deride you, or say “no” simply out of laziness or spite.  His timing is perfect.  He loves you more than anything.  He wants you to be healed, completed, etc.  He will act on your behalf.